Im so used to being treated silently.
Sometimes, people keep on telling me that their sec sch life is exuberent
but when it comes to me,
i think life is so unfair.

its not that im bragging
but
for now, one of my friend which i think ,is being treated like that
i know how hurts it feels like.

to the extent we felt like life is meaningless.
whats the point of going to sch when there's no fun?
its not that im saying sch will always be fun
everyone will experience ups and downs.

we got friends but where have they gone too?

is friends suppose to leave each other?
is friends suppose to heck care when we are in trouble?
is friends suppose to be like that?

ask yourself this.
what would you feel if you're being treated like an outcast?
how do you fell when you're treated with sarcasm?

you have to be thick skinned just to get in the group of friends.
at one point you will definitely feel that you should not be there neither everywhere.
you feel like skipping school.

its true
for those who havent feel it before,
i feel sorry for you cause you havent gone through that part of your life.
mayb not now, but when u have step in the working life
and then you will know how it feels like

keep on doing to others.
cause i believe karma will hit you back.
its just the matter of times.

for now, you might think you have everyone ard you
but
it wont be long.
there will be times when ppl are disgusted with you that they tend to leave you.

we are given choices and we are ought to make a rightful decision.
but
we are not the one who control fate.
we dont wish bad things to happen but i guess its part and parcel of life that we have to go through it.

ive been through it not long before.
but everything seems alrite now, i hope.
i dont wish to find faults cause three more weeks is precious.
i cant afford to loose this last three weeks of sch just because we felt disgruntled?

so Friends,
stop acting so childishly
we're seventeen , whats more you want?
i thought we are able to think maturely
but i guess some of us are not up there yet.

we are left with three weeks.
that is all we got
why waste time bitching, gossiping, silent treatment and all ?
WHY BOTHER?!

i thought at this point of time we shld be together
helping one another instead of being selfish towards each other.
i thought friends meant to help one another through difficulties?

but sadly i didnt see it ard me ):
its heartening.
what is happening to the friendship that have been so beautiful?
haiz.

now i doubt teachers who said
sec school friends ( as for my batch now )
will stay close till they become adult so on and so forth.
cause, i seriously cant see its happening here.

everyone seems to mind their own business
and
still selfish about one another.

I guess its time for us to stop all this childish act.
if you doubt someone, ask them.
it will be better.
i've seen ppl build friendship through enemy first.
amazing huh?

its not only one friend is being treated this way
but
i've seen it in the other 5Ns classes too.

its really saddening ):

i hope those who terase know what they should do next.
left two more weeks to be exact,
and we wont be sitting in the same class talking like we used too
coz im sure everyone have their own life and
they will be very busy soon after they leave the secondary sch years.
its proven, seriously

so all we have to do now,
especially now is ramadhan
is to
FORGIVE AND FORGET

no point keeping grudges.
it will make you suffer.

thats all (:
think about what ive said

(bebual mcm pro aje. lol :D)

toodles
xoxo
Farain claimed that i've been posting abt my boyfy.
and i can sensed that she's jealous.
lack of my attention.
lol :D

she hate the boyfy.
oh wells
i cant afford to do anything.
kekekeke

but then of coz i love both of them loads !

had fun today
went to the lib with her
WE STUDY OKIE !
i helped her maths
and its like so MIRACLE i know how to do
coz i rmbr what mr goh my boyfy teach me.
heeee (:

im super proud of myself.
we chit chat otw to lib and otw back too.
haha.
its been a long time since we go out together and stuff.
reallly, been ages i supposed.

i really miss those time
but nvm though
three more weeks and we can ENJOY after our O's
kan kan kan Farain?
hahaha.

everyday i spent my time with you la ok.
happy?
haha.

sorry mr boyfy.
u got too much attention from me alrdy,
hehe.

so sch has been okie so far.
im kinda nervous coz of o's and panic too.
haha.
so yea.
been progressing,i think?
alhamdulilah. amin amin.

will be very pack and busy this week
tight schedule( bebual mcm superstar)
haha.
seriously, will be having eng extra remedial
yipeee !
im loving every remedials as long it can help me. nyeheh.

so yea, wont be bloggin that much
prolly next week will be staying in sch with bestie to study until 9,
insyallah
hehe (:

YESTERDAY, MONDAY 24 SEPT '07

for the first ever time.
boyfy buke with me and mom
AT MY HOUSE.
nyehehe.

he so " malu-malu kucing"
mintak kena rembat je.
haha

i hope he had fun ((:
mom talked to him about everything
from family to my attitude to business to many more.
hahaha.

i guess they can click very well
coz of their business minded
hmphh.
mom really talk alot and i mean ALOT

well, im happy to see her like that though
he then went home ard 10 .
so reached home kinda late.
hurhur
so sorry to keep u here way too long.
lol :D

even today he fetched me
met him at bootsnshoe
and he send me home.
heh ((:

i love him to bits.
&
I LOVE MY UGLY FARAIN AS WELL TOOO !!!!

haha.
i bet she'll be laughing or smiling when she's reading this
well, this post meant for her.
haha

coz she's been longing to see her name at one of my post !
lol :D
craving for my love.
wakakakaka.

jk.
i dont sound so lessie, didnt i?
hahaha.

thats abt it.
gonna sleep after this.
super tired :/

ps: ignore the previous post. boyfy is nuts. and so unfair. he knows my password and heck my blogger whereas i dont even know his. grrrrr

toodles
xoxo









like i said before,
im sure to get horrendous grades.
heee.
so i got it.
Lol :D

but but but
i got a2 for Mt !
i got the highest for paper 2 ( ms zalifah said )
grrr. how i wish my EOY Mt paper score an A2.

and and and
i think i scored pretty well for SS
heeeeee :)

ms huda said my fnn coursework was done quite good
but my theory like always la kan.
hoho !
im so gonna do much better for my O's.
insyallah. amin (:

maths dont said.
but ive started to do the sums in textbook
and tys will be finish before o's.
definitely.

left with 27 more days.
im super scared la.
but then.
still have to face the reality

and
im so gonna buck up.
lalala.

thats all for now.
oh
and im down with SICKNESSS AGAIN !
having terrible sore throat, coughing non stop hits
and i woke up just feeling super sick.
i think im gonna be down with fever again if i didnt take care of myself.
grrrr.

watever.
study now(:

ps: im so missing the boyfy ):

toodles
xoxo


Hello again blog-readers !

wondering why im bloggin when im suppose to have class in school?
i bet you all know what im gonna say alrdy right?
no, i didnt skip sch
but
i was overslept again.

teeeehee :D
blamed the boyfy for not waking me up
grrr.
and dad placed my hp at the table instead.
tskk

i hate to absent myself, for NOW
o lvls in 5 weeks time !
hah !

darn darn darn darn -________-

so ytd fetched mom from airport,
she reached here ard 1123 pm
and we reached home ard 12++

plus the talking at home,
story-telling and all.
sorting out my stuff
coz im super excited to see the clothes.
haha.

yea, i got good glothes !
nyehehe.
im so loving them.
two cds for me plus my indonesia novel which ive been longing for.

after trying out
( yea, im nuts trying out stuff at midnite, but wth right )
hehehe.
so yea slept at 2 am

before that nite,
i slept at 7am and woke up at 2 pm plus.
and we went to buy groceries with papa.
after tat reached home ard 9 plus
straight away to airport

that explains why im overslept today
hur,
scuze mie pls.

but whaterver la kan
tmr just tell mr chua, i overslept blablabla
i wont go to poly to take the bloody mc,
never !

letters?
prolly
he's not satisfied, pls dial my mom's no.
heeee ((:

anw, i think ive neglected mr boyfy for the past few days.
haha
sorry , but he understand.
lol :D

i promised to him, im gonna study from today onwards.
so i have too.
heeee.
ok not because of him only, bt because i want to ohkie.
tskkk.

must explain,
ppl tend to get the wrong idea.
hahaha.

ok, im so need cash right now
dont know why
but i want only
hahahhaa.

siow eh.
lols

thats all for now.
i guess,
update more when i have smtgh else to say.

ps: lon hana puasa ( acheh language )
shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ! my boyfy dont know.
heeeeeeeeee ((:

toodles
xoxo
im feeling so wrecked.
yes ):

today buker nothing.
just a plain water ):
but but but
bro just ordered PIZZA ! :D
it will be here anytime soon.
i so cnnt wait.

heeee :D

so ytd went to followed the boyfy to his karate class.
then sleepover at kak ju's place.
finally get to meet yati and her,
but sadly theyre all half asleep when i reached home.
heh * sorry *

today went home ard 3 plus
the boyfy sent me
but to the bus stop 168 only.
heh.

and he paid for me the old navy tee that i ordered online.
lol :D
thank you sweetheart ((:

oh and.
it was so random to met syirr in the bus too.
and she was with a rabbit?
so adorable. seriously (:

grr,
my tummy growling.
com'on pizzahut.
what took you guys so long?????
haha.

oh and the operatore asked my name and i said Ferra
then she asked how old am i?
how weird is that and i said im seventeen
and guess what she said?
" oh, you sound like a kid "

HUH?!
hahaha.
thats so funnay !
im 17 ohkie !
heeeee :D

im so excited
hopefully dad will be home ard late nite or tmr morning plsss.
so cnnt wait to see him.
OMG !

TMR SUNDAY?!?!
HEEEE.
MAMA WILL BE HOME !!!
YIPEEEE.

i need to finish the house chores now.
grr

ps: papa just sms-ed me
he'll be reachin here late midnite !!!!!
wooohooo * boyfy's tone *

HAPPY WEEKENDS,BLOG READERS !

toodles
xoxo
Dear Friend; Zulhilmi,

finally ive found the courage to say im sorry. well its not that i dont want to but it takes time and guts to say Sorry. Since this is a holy month, why dont we put aside grudges and let bygones be bygones. why do we still have to reiterate the past when its long gone, right? this will be our last year, and having friend like you sometimes can cheer me up. you understand and you listen to my whining ( last time la ) but i really hope this friendship last cause sometimes, we never know when we need that someone when they are just right infront of our eyes. i know my mistakes and so do you. we've talked and sort things out and am happy that now we're friends once again. i will always remember this as part and parcel of life. what's the meaning of life when there is no ups and downs right? when there is no problem, it will seem meaningless. i seriously hope, nothing like this will happen again. at least not within this few weeks again. haha. seriously, ive missed alot from you. like your irritatingness, lame jokes, and everything. just now, when we went back together , i feel relieved and at least i will start my Fasting month without any guilt and fearness cause i apologized. and for you to forgive is up to you but ive done what i should and i wont brag about it (: the friendship we build is nonetheless priceless. and i really cherish them and hope it will last :D

your super pretty girlfriend ( LOL :D ),
Ferra (:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

boyfriend is sucha sweetheart.
told him abt what happened and he even make me feel better.
now that ive got him and also my goodfriend, Zulhilmi
i think my life will be much more better and secure?
cause i got good people around me to take care of me.
not forgetting my two beloved brothers ((:

and so today was my last paper for prelims.
but not O's so yea.
my result gonna be horrendous,
i dont doubt that
hurhur

but i will assure that my O's will be a better one at least
insyallah. amin amin amin ((:

TWO MORE DAYS AND MY PARENTS WILL BE BACK !!!
im super duper extremely excited !!
sms-ed papa and he said he come on sunday not saturday ):
nvm though, two people on the same day at one go !
hahaha.

ltr the boyfy will come to my place.
i so cnnt wait to bluetooth our pics to his comp.
its gonna be uploaded soon enough (:
heeeeee :DDDDD

by tmr, the house haveta be clean or else
i'll * piak *
in dead meat.
hahaha.

i think i gonna update more ltr.
tired.
thinking of taking a nap.
boyfy at Rp having his dance prac.
grrr.

GoodDay folks !

toodles
xoxo
Have you heard about the three times earthquake in Sumatra?
i was super shock, ok not really shock when i hear that ytd
received an sms from my brother.
it was scary.
Im sure the earthquake jolted Indonesia. ( duuuh )
even there was a " mini " tsunami when the terror struck them.

tsunami happened in 2004 and i know,
too many earthquakes happened in Indo
but this, the first day of Ramadhan?
how can this happened?

tsunami happened the day before christmas which killed many lives in Acheh.
i will never forget this one
cause i got nine relatives or was it eleven relatives of mine
from my father side, died
due to tsunami

alhamdulilah
the closest relatives was safe
yea, they are now in KL
running business with my uncle.
some of my uncle's workers are majority from Acheh
and most of them survived from the incident
my cousin, even climbed the Mosque when the water gushed through.

when i heard them story-telling,
it was super scary
even now, one of them still having treatment sponsored from my uncle
as he accidentally drink the "black water" from the tsunami
and can you imagine, tsunami was years back
but yet he is not cured?

traumatic isn't?
that's why, sometimes i feel fortunate as Spore
do not have this kind of thing happen.
insyallah, singapore will be safe from all these disaster.

even during the tsunami,
my beloved aunty effa was having her holiday at Phuket, if im not wrong.
and she was thinking of extending her stay but luckily, she didnt.
two days before tsunami, she went back to singapore.
and the resort she stayed was the one that have been badly affected by the giant waves.

i cant afford to loose any of my family members in this tragic incident
seriously i cant bear loosing the loved ones like this.
its so sadist.

back to the earthquake in Sumatra.
i was even panic when just now, bro said that he felt the shaking
and i was being such a dumb goof, who dont know exactly which part sumatra is and asked " where is sumatra actually? is it tempat mama stay?"

i asked that delibrately.annoying i know.
and he said " yup, but mama stay just a lil bit further down in Sumatra"
he also said , the earthquake is further down Medan
so i was quite relieved when he said that.
Mama is in acheh, which is quite a distance from Medan.
so i think, they prolly felt the jarring movement only.

i really pray hard so that mama will be safe
and my family over there too.
cause, i dont want anything to happen like how it happened during tsunami.
insyallah, mama will come home safely this sunday (:
pray for her, will you?
its not that i care so much abt the stuff she bought for me, but i really want her to be home.

for those who havent heard the story of tsunami from these ppl who really experienced them.
you will shed tears.
no kidding.
its disasterous.
the water is smelly
even bro went back to Acheh and he see it for himself.

they will tell you how cruel and how ugly tsunami can be like.
i guess its a lesson from the man above,
no ! seriously.

i think if ppl keep doing sins
the world will end soon.
moreover now, many things is happenin in the world.
so many calamities is happening around us nowadays.
and many unforgivable things happen too.

somehow, i think its a sign of " the world is ending soon "
the world is old enough, i think.
since million years ago when prophet was the messenger of allah.
even papa told me the signs on how the world will end.
and its really happening ard us now.

grrr.
i dont know why i suddendly become so religious.
but im really afraid.
i really pity those Islam innocent people in Indonesia
who was once had lost their family and home.
and now, i think history goin to repeat itself all over again.

there will be no ending to all this
unless people in this world, have become the lil angel.
seriously.

whats happening to our world?
who can save them?
do we still have time to repent?

only we have ourself to answer this (:

toodles
xoxo
Hello again blog-hoppers !
((:

today was awesome.
followed the bf to his sch
supposingly to have their dance prac tday
but it was cancelled
and only one of his fren turned up
so they did they poster thingy for their showcase
come October.

heee.
i helped out too ok
well not much, but finding pics for their poster
and they chose the one i choosed ok.
hehehehe :DD

after tat, me and the bf laze ard at RP
we got no where to go.
and so i played his lappy
we were laughing our ass off reading this Jason Periera blog
he super full of humour ok.
haha.
should go read his blog, but i forget the URL

dumb (:

after tat , ard 5 plus.
went to my house.
we just put our bags, then we went to the nearest " PARK "
at my house.

we took some pics
and
im so excited to post them.
well i cant now, coz of my hp error
hohoho =))

but i'll upload soon.
super nice okie !
hehe

yea, thats all.
:DDD

tmr sci prac.
hurhur.
the bf insist on me studying chem.
haha.
but im kinda laaaa.zzzz.yyyy
lol :DD

tmr dh PUASE !
but i cant ((:
heeeee

HAPPY FASTING EVERYONE ! :DD

im still counting down to the weekends.
parents will be back (:
yipee !

GDNITE ALL (:

toodles
xox
I LOVE DINIE FARIS MORE THAN EVER !
heeeeee :DD

so we went out
despite im being angry at him about ytd.
PMS mayb, thats why get all sensitive ((:

however, i love him to bits.
hohoh :D

we went to Town
actually just to walk around
tired of spending time ard woodlands.
so yea

went there.
had our early dinner, at Long John Silver
ive been craving for the ocean's bites since ytd.
since bro cnnt get that for me, he does :DD
sucha sweetheart (:

we ate at Lido.
before that, went to Cineleasure than Lido.

i guess today is our LUCKY DAY !
we thought of watching movie w/o eating
but then i insist on eating la.
lapar tauss :P

so we ate, while trying to finish our meal
there's this lady
who offered us two movie ticks to Rogue Assasin eh?
i dont know la the title.
haha.

at first we thought must pay,
but she said its free cause she's in rush
moreover its a FREE TICKET

since he stayed at Pasir Ris
and im worried he'll be home late
we took quite sometime to think if we wanna watch it
unless its a HAIRSPRAY, i sure watch la kan,
but this is a violence show, so i dont really care

he insist on watching, so we watched.
QUITE a BORE to me
i hate violence movie
moreover there's slashing of bloods la, ape la
alot of killing.
urgh
disgusting .
pffft :/

ended at 9:20 something i guess.
and we went to the MRT straight
he insist on sending me home
so yea.

reached home ard 10++
he's the sweetest guy la.
i know his tired , he had his hip hop prac since morning
plus he had an upset stomach ):

and i dont even think he had enough rest and sleep
but he still want to send me home (((:
sucha sweetheart kan?
heeeeee :]

noone at home,
and im waiting for him to reach home and go online
since my ppd low, i cant sms him
haha.

sigh.
i pity him.
he must be darn tired.

I enjoyed today, aniwae
and i think he does too ( cause he sms me and said the same thing )
LOL :DDDD

and he sms-ed saying his thirsty and tired.
))):
should have give him the mieral water i bought
i seriously forget
hahaha.
and yes bf, i know you're tired.
sorry to make you accompany me ):

im missing him now
but we're meeting again tmr
since he got his prac again.

grrrrr.
why do they have to do the prac early at 10 or 11 am?
shessssh.

thats about today (:
bored but wth.
i feel like bloggin this !!

GDNITE ALL !
im so loving the bf more than ever =P

toodles
xoxo

ps: sadly no pics taken. grr. how can i forgot???? shoot me ((:



its so irritating
EVERYTHING.

blogger is worst.
and his* msn is even more irritating
hence, ive blocked his acc.
so i wont CHAT with him

and dont have to entertain his bloody irritating comp/msn
watever. i dont give a damn
bf, i know ure reading this. but i dont care. !
im angry !

grrrr.
tskkk.
watever.

talk to u whenever i feel like it.
urgh !

im pissed off with everything
exams tmr again
fucker la .
everything is sucha pain in the ass.

URGH !
fuck all this things la.

damnit!
EVERYBODY SHUT UP LA CAN?!

PS: NO CALLS WILL BE ENTERTAIN. THANK GOD I CNNT REP ANY SMS.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

FYDA THANKS FOR THE HELP
MUCH APPRECIATE
I LOVE YOU

AND
I STILL LOVE MY BOYFRIEND.
GRRR.

THOUGH HE MAKES ME A LIL ANGRY.
TSKKK :

TOODLES
XOXO

For a moment, i though of giving up
For a moment, i thought of just heck care
For a moment, i thought of shutting myself

but i guess i was so stupid
to think that im a loser -___-
yea, i thought of that coz i think ive done badly for my prelims.
i just couldnt accept the fact la.

i was being so foolish, childish and everything
name it.

but then after what my bf and dearest Fyda said to me
i finally open my eyes that
ive been stressing for nine moths
and left with only five weeks
how can i ever give up?

i promise not to dissapoint my parents,
and i want that telescope badly from my bf ( hehehe)
how can i think of putting everything aside?

i have to go on.
five more weeks.
OMG ! yea five more weeks left.
grrr.

so much to do, so little time left.
i wonder if i can survive this time round
hopefully i can
insyallah.

i guess tmr will be the day.
i dont care bout my prelims result anymore.
teachers if u feel like nag at me, do so.
i dont care.

all im concentrating now is my O's.
seriously.
Fyda gonna take care of me since i couldnt discipline myself.
hurhur
and i'll appreciate what she want to do for me.

i love you to bits can.
and my bf too whom have been enduring to all my sighness.

prelims again on monday.
i'll try and im gonna pay for it.

i promise to study phy tmr to Fyda
and im gonna do that.
i dont want to dissapoint her who have been trying hard to motivate me

thats all people.

ALLAH, DONT LET ME FAIL DURING MY O'S PLS. THATS ALL I PRAY FOR ):

toodles
xoxo
im feeling all moody.

just banged the comp for giving me a hard time

just switched off the hp before done smsing with him* la.

feel like banging this bloody window for creating such "scary"
noise which seem to be irritating to me right now.

and that main door for entertaining the wind.

the heavy rain which URGH !

EVERYTHING SEEMS TO BE SO IRRITATING

i shut the window, the door and everything

im shutting myself for now.

DONT CONTACT ME, ANYONE !

im dead bored and im so stresssed !!!!!!!!!!!

im so fcu*in HATE this TIME !

i dont care for whatever and whoever !!!


GOODBYE WORLD !
Hello sweethearts ! (:

had phy class today.
just took the 120 MCQ test
after lesson end, mr Chua
showed us his own-made video clip for the class.

he's uber sweet ok ((:
and we all totally love him to bits la.
seriously.

and he also showed the class disasterous dance during CIP at old folks home.
super funny and everyone laughed their ass off.
especially Jun He, giggles
he's a stiff person and when he dance, * only god-knows how*
hehe, no offend dear friend (:

when the slideshow part, its super touching
he put there " 5N1, 07 Forever "
sweet kan? hehe.

the other friends got the slideshow in their thumbdrive.
gonna get it soon.
anw, i love the vid and how he make the effect
plus the pic that he have compiled together.
nice la, i swear ! haha.

i HAVENT STUDY YET !!!
argghhh !
hahahah.

puase next week.
mom coming back on the 16th
arghh !
nobody to siapkan sahur for us !!!
)))':

toodles
xoxo

ps: mr boyfriend, i love yesterday too (:
Im down with fever, flu, bad headache.
had maths class, and we end early ard 1 plus
then i was caught in the rain :(((

it feels terrible.
my condition got worst, i think.
still hwk have to be done.
and i dont want to just lay down on my bed thinkin that my sickness wil be better
coz it wont.

i dont even take medicine which is a nono.
so, i got to do something though im not feeling all hyped up.

anw, i didnt regret goin to sch.
coz in the morning, i cant even get myself out of the bed
then i smsed mr goh that i prolly cnnt come,
but i came to a point whereby, this is much more impt.

and the bf promise to get me the telescope tat we saw at toyrus(its not a toy la) if i meet his requirement.
hoho. he better keep his promise.

i'll be meeting him ltr.
doing maths topic on vectors.
heeee (:

that's all i gotta said.
i hate running nose.
urgh !

toodles
xoxo